BP. Trial 2012. No settlement. No exceptions.

Trial of the Century … February 27 … ::sound of record scratching:: WHAT?! Delayed?With talks of a 14 Billion Dollar Settlement? AYFKM? [UPDATE March 8: Please call your Senators about the RESTORE Act, soon as ya can thx] How many billion dollars does it take to un-decimate the wildlife population of the Gulf Coast? How much to build a new America’s Wetlands, an essential part of our ecosystem? How much to un-sicken and un-kill all those people and dolphins? … If corporations are people, then how come these people can get away with murder?

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O, Death. Of the Gulf. And maybe us.

The first rule of the Ladies’ Guide to the Apocalypse is: Avoid certain death. Why do blowout preventers exist on oil wells, anyway? Well, partially, because the methane doesn’t exit in a steady stream. It burps. And methane is spewing out of that oilcano hole at a rate of 3000 to 1. So multiply the number of Valdez tankers this bloodletting has claimed, and multiply that by 3000, and that’s how much extra methane has been released into the Gulf so far. One big burp, and we’re all done for.

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Deepwater Horizon oil spill = America’s colon cancer

Stardate: Oil catastrophe Mayday, 2010… New Orleans is America’s groin. Not the “asshole of America” nor “America’s taint,” mind you, because this place is far too sacred to be dismissive like that. I mean yes, we literally sit at the bottom of the drainage basin for the nation’s spine — the Mississippi River — and Louisiana’s marshes catch a lot of the trash that flows down from Minnesota and points in between. The nation’s pesticides and chemical spills all go South in the rain, sticking in our dirt. The driftwood decorating our yards in the Lower Ninth Ward, pulled up from the levee shores of the Industrial Canal, used to be trees at one point up in there in the heartland.

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