You can take our hippie food when you pry it from our cold, dead hands

In recipes, diy medicinals, food science by summerburkes3 Comments

Been thinking a lot about Monsanto lately. Everyone’s favorite corporate villain. Are they really that villainous?

We’ll answer that question with a question: Does a bum poop on the sidewalk?

After all, Monsanto basically invented Napalm, DDT, Agent Orange, and Corexit, the chemical dispersant which made us ill and homeless, and continues to make thousands upon thousands of people sick.

We are still homeless, and they are still rich. And their spillionaire friends are still chemically poisoning American people using taxpayer-funded governmental planes and equipment. Mad yet?

And people here in California were freaking out a couple weeks ago when Prop. 19 came up for a vote. The stoners — contrary to squaresville belief, their brains contain more than just song lyrics and quotes from Southparksmelled a rat and opposed it.

George Soros, the multibillionaire backer (and some say secret architect) of the bill is a major investor in Monsanto stock. Stoners, growers, and cancer-fighting pirates want the weed industry to grow like the wine industry — all organic and lovingly-crafted, boutique-like. Otherwise, everyone’s gonna get genetically-modified pesticide bammer and that’s it. Forever.

Word is still out on whether Soros was hatched in the same dark and slimy lizard cave as Rupert Murdoch, but something tells us he’s got a wee bit more class. Anyone who lends a financial hand to the ailing field of actual journalism gets points in our book, even if we know the point-getter destroys national economies and buys bottles of wine priced in the same bracket as a fixer-upper in New Orleans. But we don’t trust Soros, or Prop. 19, farther than we could trebuchet him.

Also, Bill and Melinda Gates, America’s favorite nerd-population power-couple, just kicked everyone in the stomach by investing in Monsanto. This is particularly upsetting, this and Soros, because the both of these guys are so freaking rich they could actually STAND UP TO Monsanto. But they are in league. Their dirty money is all in the same genetically-modified, patented pig pile.

Here’s a fascinating Youtube history lesson on Darth Fooder called “Monsanto: Extinction”:

So here’s the point.

Today — November 17, 2010 — the Senate will deliberate and maybe pass a bill that would essentially outlaw gardening and saving seeds. Senate bill S-510, the Food Safety Modernization Act, is another blasphemy-in-disguise from Monsanto and Friends, designed to put all our eggs in one basket-shaped cage. On lockdown. With no windows.

You get the drift. Somebody telling you what to eat. Or, in this case, telling you the good things you like to eat might be dangerous, while the multicolored plastic FDA-approved crapfood continues to proliferate on the shelves of gargantuan box stores like a non-regulated virus.

The bill already passed in the House. Which is … unbelievable. But believable. So thanks to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, it’s about to go live. Unless … maybe, unless we flood all the players with phone calls. If not, at least the news may say the Senate was flooded with phone calls and then the jackals “won” (stole it) again anyway, meaning our system of government is REALLY broken.

Farmers are quite fed up with it all. Some are contemplating going on strike if this bill goes through. Imagine no production for a year. Maybe then farmers would get a little respect.

Even though only 2% of the US population now farms, they are providing one of the basic essentials of life… Food. Many are tired of always being portrayed as the cause of all ills and being subject of biased regulation and bureaucracy. At my last Farm Bureau meeting the concept of a farmers strike was tossed around, and it was not ill received.” -commenter RogueIntellect, from this Grist article on s-510

Read this article by Serious Eats to understand what’s going on. Watch an explanatory video here (no really watch it), sign the petition here, and call up author Senator Johnny Isakson’s Washington office at (202) 224-3643, and his Georgia office at (770) 661-0999. Go to and type in your zip code in the box in the upper right hand corner to find your own Senators’ numbers, or call the Capitol Switchboard and ask to be directly connected to House Majority Leader Sen. Reid’s office and then your Senators’ offices: (202) 224-3121. Certainly it wouldn’t hurt to make a couple calls …

Tell them thank you for all the regulations so far. Those will suffice. Tell them you’d rather decide for yourself what to eat, and maybe they could copy the back of the Burning Man festival ticket, and stick a label on raw / organic / homegrown / non-santo products which reads “YOU VOLUNTARILY ASSUME THE RISK OF SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH JUST BY INGESTING THIS UNPASTEURIZED YOGURT.”

But they ain’t gonna shake down Maggie’s farm no more on our behalf. We mean it’s time to activate the phone tree, ladies.

“If people let the government decide what foods they eat and what medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny.” ~Thomas Jefferson

And remember … it costs the taxpayers a rumored $23,000 for the D.E.A. to use a helicopter for half a day. Soon, unless we squawk together a little bit, they may be low-flying the choppers over fields all across America, knocking everyone’s crops down with the landing gear.

UPDATE: The Senate has voted to table it for 60 days. Something tells us social media is actually working to help us get our Congress back, or at least know what’s going on. We’re heartened, but we hope everyone keeps calling, especially since the Senate Republicans also voted today — unanimously — AGAINST a bill to help guarantee fair pay for women.

Call ’em up!

Senator Sherrod Brown of Ohio supports S 510, and called out the statistics by the Centers for Disease Control that report there are 76 million foodborne illnesses a year, with 5,000 resulting in death. What Brown did not say was that the FDA — the very agency further empowered by S 510 — is responsible for the approval of pharmaceutical drugs that result in 100,000 deaths a year.

None of the supporters of S 510 will acknowledge the corrupt nature of the Food and Drug Administration. Monsanto executives now work at the FDA or on President’s Obama’s Food Safety Task Force.

What legislators continue to ignore from the public is that we do not support giving federal agencies even more power — especially over something as inherently private as food choices.

None of the legislators will discuss the FDA raids on natural food operations which sickened no one, while it allowed Wright County Egg to sicken people for decades before finally taking action.”

LINKS to get us started on not eating garbage anymore:

Food Freedom: Monsanto’s superweeds come home to roost — 11 million US acres infested

Run from the Cure: The Rick Simpson Story

Jezebel: Mysterious magenta fibers crawling out of your skin? You’re not alone!

Physorg: Growing Roundup-resistant weed problem must be dealt with, expert says

NY Times: After growth, fortunes turn for Monsanto after problems with seeds

Hartke: Family farm ordered to destroy 50,000 pounds of raw cheese

Why Monsanto is paying farmers to spray its rivals’ herbicides

Ecoversity: Amaranth, Pigweed, and Monsanto (so if a staple grain of ancient peoples resists your Roundup, of course the answer is to add another carcinogen to Roundup to kill the delicious, versatile, nutrient-rich “weed” which could help the hunger problem…)

Obama taps food-industry exec from multinational junk-food giant Mars, Inc. for important USDA post (GAAAAAAH – ed.)

An aerial view of a crop circle made by local farmers and Greenpeace volunteers in Isabela province, 300 km northeast of Manila, on Saturday Sept. 30, 2006. The crop circle, with a slash over the letter ‘M’ symbolizes farmer rejection of alleged genetically modified Bt corn crops from Monsanto corporation. (AP Photo/Greenpeace,Melvyn Calderon,HO)

HuffPo: You’re appointing who? Please, Obama, say it’s not so!

Grist: Another Monsanto man in a key USDA post? Obama’s ag policy’s giving me whiplash

Youtube: Raw for 30 days — the cure for type 2 diabetes

Documentary: The Disappearing Male

Drug companies eliminate medical herbs from Europe

more on the Codex Alimentarius, and other stuff, by a witty Brit:

Youtube: How to start the raw food diet / how to transition to raw

Youtube: Monsanto’s toxic milk – banned in Europe

Youtube: Scrambled Eggs

Planet Green: Proof – Processed meats directly linked to cancer, and what to eat instead

Everyday health: Off-gassing and allergies — allergies management center

Treehugger: Peak water – exposing the water crisis

YouTube: What in the world are they spraying?

Environment, Health & Safety Online: The real facts about Alzheimers and aluminum

The straight dope: Does exposure to aluminum cause Alzheimer’s disease?

Natural Cure Remedy: Heavy Metal Detox

Youtube: America needs to be outraged at what is going on in the Gulf of Mexico

Oil Spill Action: Feds continue to re-open waters to fishing in the face of widespread concern

BP Oil Spill Lawyers’ Blog: NOAA facing further criticism due to shady history of employees

FOSL: While you were breathing: 99.8 ppm VOCs measured at Orange Beach, AL as well was capped – “Amazing,” says scientist (VIDEO) Gulf Residents say I’m Not Your Experiment

Creature from Jekyll Island: A second look at the Federal Reserve

Phoenix Rising from the Gulf (a highly technical, articulate, well-researched, well-footnoted, well-informed blog about the Oilpocalypse mess — two thumbs up. way up)

ABC News: Genetic Mutations Let Ozzy Osbourne Party Hard

Treehugger: Russian woman builds house of 5,000 glass bottles

Mythbusters 71 results: Pirate special (didja know pirates wear eye patches so they can see in the dark? … switch eyes after you board a ship to go down below. Instant night vision. Remember this when you’ve got plans to sneak around)

i believe the children are our future


Follow Summer Burkes on Twitter.


  1. Pingback: you can take my hippie food when you pry it from my cold, dead hands (via The Ladies’ Guide to the Apocalypse) « LI

  2. Pingback: you can take my hippie food when you pry it from my cold, dead hands (via The Ladies’ Guide to the Apocalypse) « OntheWilderSide

  3. Awesome post, I found your site today, er yesterday, it’s 2 am my time, thank you for all your comprehensive links!

Leave a Reply to Anne Cancel reply